Where I Am

Its been so long.So very very long that I have written anything creative or happy or anything worth reading really.
I got married. The flowers were beautiful and did not reflect the florist from whom I bought them. The dress, guests, food, everything, went smashingly well and before we could quite comprehend it, we were thrust into the realm of matrimony.
When I say thrust, I mean that suddenly God shone a light down on us and said, " Now I'm going show you each how selfish you are, fight nice". I'm kidding. :) But it was a little shocking to see just how many differences there are in males and females. I'm talking about those glaring little truths that don't appear until you're trying to decide what to do with a free evening. One of us, I won't say which one, wants to sit in an organic coffee shop-the one with the barista who looks like a gyspy- and drink cofee while discussing dreams,ideas, and ideal health insurance. The other one of us, we won't say which one, wants to put on clothing washed in a special formula and sit quietly- WITH OUT TALKING!- while shooting at animals. We're learning and growing but its not a very speedy process, thus the clause where God tells us to work on it till death do us part.
When the small truths about our differences aren't glaring us in the eye, this life is a lovely one.
There have been more changes brought about with marriage that I am still learning to adapt too. First there was moving to a new community. I conquered this one with all the grace of a bull in a china shop. It doesn't help that I was introduced to my new home on a sweltering June day in a car with no air conditioning. I think my first impression was, " I hate it here, take me back!" And I probably said that with all the tact of a dominant first-born woman. I'm learning to love things about this place though, just like anywhere else God leads me, there is something good. In this case, the good is the beauty of the sun rising through a corn field (a sight I now see as I get up at the crack of dawn with my husband-he goes to work and I back to bed). The good is also the city park, it's full of beautiful trees and is surrounded by a meandering walkway. Then of course there's the fun in dodging horse manure left on the road by all the fun loving amish horses. :)
I have several jobs, my favorite is working as an aid in the local assisted living home. Sometime I'll write of all the wonderful things I have learned there but for now I'll leave you with just two. First, drink coffee, it seems to be a wonderful preservative of the mind and body. The second truth came from a wonderfully grandmotherly little lady. I played piano one evening and she told me of a time when she could play very well and she loved it. Then she looked at her hands and with a little sigh, said that they were too weak and shaky now to play anything. I asked her if that wasn't hard to give up and she smiled and said yes, buts its ok because, " THATS NOT WHERE I AM ANY MORE". So when I wonder if this will ever become home and if my new relationships will ever be perfect and when I miss the old normal, I remember, thats not where I am anymore. This right now, right here, the people in my life NOW, this is where I am.
Sonya