Of biscotti, music, and love's reward

Another post. I know, astonishing and perhaps a bit quick on the heels of my last one. I’m feeling ill today and can’t work since my job requires communication, LOUD communication (I work with the hearing impaired among us) and I feel like writing. This is what happens when I’m home alone with my thoughts for more then one day at a time. I think too many things and thinking makes me want to write. Unfortunately, I usually think up great things but then I’m done thinking them and it’s hard to go back and write them out.
As I said, I don’t feel well. It’s mainly just my throat that hurts so abominably but this has affected my speaking abilities. As in, I can’t. :( Every now and then I speak a strangled word into the silence around me, just to see if my voice coming back. It’s getting there but then “Hello” isn’t really a worthy conversation on which to base my health progression. I tried drinking vinegar yesterday to heal my self and it helped, I’m sure. I can’t imagine what I would feel like if I hadn’t taken vinegar. :) Today I’ve decided to vary my treatment a bit and have coffee and brownie biscotti. I think its helping. I love brownie biscotti; I made some yesterday and its far better then any of the stuff I’ve made before. I will gladly share if you want some.
I have discovered a new song that I positively love. I was up at my dear friend Ang’s house last night and she had this CD going. Somehow in the midst of our in-depth discussion one of the songs stood out enough for me to decide I liked it. So I came home and found it on line and proceeded to brain wash myself. The song is from Jewel’s Lullaby CD and it’s called, “Angel Standing By”. After having listened to it several times, I began wondering if I should be listening to this song. It sounds as green as CO people look and smell. I think the word would be new age. Now I don’t believe Rock is an ok thing to listen to. I can tell you why I think this if you ever care to ask. So I’m wondering, for the same reason, is “Green music” ok? Should I even wonder and bother with trying to know? If I wonder then I’ll think and if I think I’ll come to a conclusion and then I’ll have to follow my conclusion. Is it right, wrong, or amoral?
I am amazed at the binding power of love. I was pondering this in my journal the other evening and I thought of Christ, being bound by Love and a sense of Honor to His Creation. My hurts caused His tears, my guilt, His death, and when he sees me it isn’t as a painful reminder, but a precious reward. I can’t fathom the strength of a love to see the source of Ones deepest agony, as a reward.
So why would I want to listen to music, to do anything really, that could possibly drive the nails deeper? Why not try to live worthy of Love’s Reward? Why not…
So I’m still thinking, still wondering, and I probably will continue to do so today. It will be a good day for me, hopefully, you too. Sonya